Week Fourteen – Semolina

During all my years at school, I never once had a school dinner.  I was clearly one of those children who had a very generous mum, who – five days a week – packed my Snoopy lunchbox with a corned beef sandwich (no butter), a packet of Discos, an apple and a Club biscuit, all to be washed-down with a flask of Kia-ora.

It is probably for this reason that I have never eaten semolina.  Judging by the results of a Good Food Magazine survey on ‘The nation’s most hated school dinners’ where it came in at number seven, it seems I have had a lucky escape.

As an aside…

My unexpected visit to the Netmums website that held the results of the food survey, revealed a few things to me: –

i.            I need to add tapioca to my food firsts list

ii.            … and spotted dick.

iii.            It also confirmed that I am, in no way, ready to become a mother (but you all probably knew that already)

In fact, the only contact I’ve had with semolina (apart from when I bought a can of it from Morrison’s earlier) was the rhyme that fellow classmates used to chant in the playground – shortly before lunch, I imagine: –

School dinners.  School dinners

Mushy peas.  Mushy peas

Soggy semolina.  Soggy semolina

I feel sick.  Get a bucket quick

Oh too late, I’ve done it on my plate

 Who remembers that??  For me, it brought back a whole host of childhood memories about swapping Mexico ’86 stickers, losing all my marbles to Gavin and not being able to talk to girls.  If I’m honest, not much has changed – I semi-regularly swap stories with someone from Mexico, I have definitely lost all my marbles and I certainly don’t talk to girls (what with me being a grown up and all).  But, none of this is relevant – This is about me eating a new food…

I accidentally boiled the first batch of semolina – almost to the point of totally drying it out.  Apparently, the microwave has a button for ten minutes as well as a button for one minute – Who’d have thought?!  The instructions on the can had implored me not to boil its contents.

My second attempt – after I had spent a while chipping the previous effort out of the bowl – was better.

 

Mushy peas and semolina seemed an appropriate combination

It had the consistency of Angel Delight (or Tesco Whip or Asda Angelic Whip Delight or equivalent) and tasted creamy and a bit like rice pudding.  It wasn’t something I would describe as tasty, but was a long way off being in my top ten of dinner foods I detested.  If I had a dessert like/dislike continuum (which I strangely didn’t until the start of this sentence), it would fall pretty much in the middle – A long way behind chocolate ice cream and significantly ahead of lychees.  It was just average.

Semolina with jam – A top ten classic!

Afterthought…

I’m not sure if semolina is served in school canteens any more.  I’m guessing it is probably not, so I have taken it upon myself to update the rhyme for a new generation to chant in the playground: –

School dinners.  School dinners

No MSG.  Low in calories

No turkey twizzler, so says Jamie Oliver

…

…

 

Failure! I just can’t think of the last two lines…

Well, it appears I am not going to be the next Poet Laureate – But you might be!

Can you have a go at finishing the updated rhyme?  Just write your effort in the comments box (below) and submit them.

The best one – in my opinion (not that that counts for much in the poetic world) – will win a can of semolina with the complete rhyme printed out and stuck on.

Your time starts now…